Avocado(n’t even talk to me in the morning) toast
1. Toast bread until it matches your wooden floorboards. I usually just shove a loaf of bread in the oven and attend to it when my house smells like it’s about to burn down. So basically just eyeball it.
2. While your bread is having a tan, find some ripe avocados and beat until gooey. I like to add pesto and lime juice when I’m feeling quirky, which is always.
3. Poach an egg. I literally have an egg poaching kit and I still can’t poach eggs. Somebody send help (by way of delivering poached eggs).
4. Sprinkle a ton of pepper onto your stacked toast to remind yourself how quirky and unpredictable you are.
It’s a match(a latté)!
1. Pour a teaspoon of matcha powder into your hipster mason jar.
2. Add a teaspoon of condensed milk (optional).
3. Add ice cream (optional, but kind of necessary).
4. Fill the rest of the cup with milk and ice cubes.
1. Sit in your backyard or somewhere idyllic to hoodwink yourself into thinking that you have your life together.
2. Make use of the soft morning light for your Pinterest af shot.
3. Chug your matcha latté in 2 seconds because it turned out so much better than you had anticipated.
4. Take a bite of your now soggy avocado toast.